Friday, May 11, 2012

MVS Prom & After Prom: Expectations, Reminders, and Essential Conversations


Friday, 11 May 2012

Greetings Upper School Parents:

As we approach what is sure to be a successful MVS Prom weekend, I want to communicate clearly and directly to you our expectations for student conduct.  Prom will be held on Saturday, 19 May at Dayton Racquet Club, lasting from 9-11:30PM.  After Prom will be held here at MVS (in the gymnasium and atrium areas), immediately following Prom, from 12:midnight-3:30AM, with an abundance of food, activities, and events, sponsored and organized by the MVS Parents’ Association.

Prom season is often depicted as a rite of passage, celebrating friendships and accomplishments of the school year past, while also looking forward to completing the academic year and the approach of summer.  I anticipate this year’s Prom and After Prom, under the careful planning by the Junior Class of 2013 and MVS Parents’ Association, will be enjoyable and memorable events. However, as is the case in many school cultures, school dances and similar evening events also raise potential anxieties about student at-risk behavior, including drinking, unsafe driving, and other potential dangers. We are all concerned about student safety. Throughout the year, but particularly during Homecoming and Prom seasons, tragic incidents are portrayed in the local and national press, reinforcing the fragility of human life and the potential dangers associated with teen driving, the “rites of spring,” and other adolescent vulnerabilities. Such events can be devastating to any community, so with your added attention as parents, I want to further protect our students at MVS from making unwise decisions that could carry significant, if not dire, consequences.

As added protection of our students (and for increased peace of mind for parents and teachers), we will again administer individual breathalyzer tests to all students attending Prom.  The devises we selected (and have used at a number of previous dances) are recommended both by law enforcement and substance counseling programs.  The use of these tests is to affirm that our students are safe and secure, as well as to reduce suspicions about at-risk behaviors at MVS events.  As a school, MVS will not tolerate any student drinking or illegal substance use before or during Prom or After Prom; to that end, we will be vigilant in our monitoring of student conduct.

If your Junior or Senior is attending Prom (which we hope is the case), I encourage you to have candid discussions with your child (as well as with her or his date and other friends) about the important topics of safety and responsible decision making, carefully reviewing their plans, your expectations, and communicating directly with other parents regarding any questions you might have.

As parents, I request your assistance in modeling proactive and responsible decision making by our students. Please resist all temptations to offer alcohol to any students, even as a ceremonial toast or glass of champagne with dinner, especially since such actions are in stark conflict with MVS school policy, not to mention state laws. Such offers place students in an unnecessarily precarious dilemma. If your daughter or son is traveling in a limousine or carpooling with a group of friends, please take the time to ask, then check to confirm, that there are no “smuggled containers or substances” within their vehicles. It is better to be safe now, rather than remorseful later. If students (or you, their parents) still feel compelled to engage in any at-risk activities, they are advised to avoid Prom and After Prom entirely. Any student, whom chaperones suspect to be under the influence, will be denied from entering these events and, as a result, we will phone you, as their parents, to come pick them up. Believe me, these are circumstances in which no one wants to participate.

Chaperones (me included), who agree to work for the benefit of students in supporting student events (without whom, there simply would be no Prom) will use their best judgment in assessing student conduct; however, these decisions will be at the discretion of faculty chaperones, Vin Romeo (as Junior Dean), and me. I encourage you to be candid with your daughter or son in your conversations surrounding alcohol, drug use, or other at-risk behaviors. Obviously, any violation of the alcohol and drug policy at or around an MVS event may result in serious consequences, up to and including expulsion. The potential dangers of unsafe driving raise further concerns. Our hope is that through active and direct discussions, transcending both home and school, such matters can be avoided entirely, allowing everyone at Prom and After Prom to safely enjoy the events as they are intended.

In the interest of ensuring student safety, under no circumstances will a student be allowed to leave Prom or After Prom before their conclusions, without first contacting a parent directly. All students are to arrive at Prom by 9:30PM. Later, students should change out of their prom attire at MVS, after driving directly to After Prom. All students are to arrive at After Prom by 12:15AM. If any student arrives late, or asks to leave early from either event, we will have him or her phone you directly. If a student encounters an unanticipated delay, we ask that she or he phone the main phone number at MVS (434-4444, ext 157, the concessions stand in the MVS Atrium), to keep us informed of their status, just to be safe. Once a student has officially departed Prom or After Prom (having contacted a parent first), she or he will not be permitted to re-enter the event. Students are expected to cooperate fully with chaperones, parent volunteers, and staff members at these events. Attendance at Prom and After Prom are indeed privileges, requiring an appropriate degree of student (and parent) responsibility. We look forward to enjoying these activities with your children; however, in the interest of student safety, we will be attentive in monitoring student behavior and conduct.

A great deal of work has gone into planning for Prom and After Prom, on the part of students, parents, faculty members, and administrators. We will do our very best to create an environment that will be safe and enjoyable for everyone involved. I am confident the students will have a great time. Again, as partners in the essential support of MVS students, please encourage your child (and her or his peers) to use sound judgment in making Prom and After Prom a wonderful, enjoyable, and safe night for all involved. Should you have any specific questions regarding Prom, feel free to contact Vin Romeo (as Dean of the Junior Class).

With sincere regards,


Sam Wagner
Head of Upper School

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